Boutique, Depth-Oriented, East Bay Therapy
In-Person in Orinda, CA / Online Across California
Going through the motions isn't working anymore. Start feeling connectedto yourself again.
Relational therapy for adults & college students ready to understand and feel what’s happening beneath the surface.
Begin with a free consultation →Together, we turn understanding into new experiences, creating room for lasting change.
Anxiety · Life Transitions · Self-Esteem · Relationship Patterns
Life Doesn't Feel
the Way You Expected.
…and you don't quite feel like yourself.
Maybe there's nothing obviously wrong. You're doing what needs to be done, keeping up with your life, and from the outside, things may look fine. But you don't feel as fulfilled as you thought you would, and some part of you is still waiting for that to change.
You think things through from every angle, replaying conversations and decisions long after they're over. Was that the right call? Did I handle that wrong? Behind the overthinking is often the same question: what will they think? You're hyper-attuned to the people around you, picking up on a change in someone's tone, sensing when someone's upset before they've said so. You say yes when you mean no, then wonder why you keep putting yourself last.
Over time, all of this can leave you feeling disconnected from yourself. No one else may see it. From the outside, your life still looks great. But somewhere inside, there’s a gnawing feeling that something is missing and that you’re moving through a life that doesn’t feel authentic to you. You may not know what would make it different. Sometimes it becomes more obvious when someone asks what you want, and you realize you’re not sure. Or maybe you do know, but saying it out loud feels too risky. You’ve become so used to noticing what everyone else feels and needs that it can be hard to know what you feel and need yourself.
Maybe this feels familiar…
-
Nothing urgent may be happening, but part of you stays on alert. You run through everything you need to remember, rehearse conversations that have not happened, or prepare for problems that may never come. Even when you have time to rest, your mind rarely lets you settle into it.
-
You check something off your list, but the satisfaction barely registers before your attention moves to what comes next. Your inner critic keeps raising the bar or pointing out what you could have done better. No matter how much you accomplish, the relief never seems to catch up with the effort.
-
You get through work, school, errands, and conversations. From the outside, nothing may look wrong. Inside, you may feel like you are just getting through each day instead of fully experiencing your life.
-
A shorter text, a quieter voice, or a different expression can set off an alarm inside you. You replay the interaction, search for your mistake, and start thinking about what you should say or do to make things right. You become so focused on the other person that what you feel or need can disappear from view.
-
You want to feel close, but you may find yourself apologizing, overexplaining, or making your needs smaller to keep the relationship steady. Different relationships bring you back to the same painful question: “Why does being close to someone seem to require giving up so much of myself?”
-
Everyone keeps asking what comes next, and you are still trying to understand who you are now.
A job change, a move, a relationship ending, a milestone that didn't feel the way you thought it would. Whatever brought you here, it's left you unsure of the version of yourself that's supposed to come next, and unsure how to find your way there.
-
You may have read the books, journaled, tried coping strategies, or talked about the pattern before. You can sometimes explain exactly where it comes from, but when the moment arrives, the same anxiety, self-doubt, or need to please takes over. You want more than another explanation. You want something to actually feel different.
If this sounds like your experience, welcome.
You are in the right place.
You don't need to know exactly what's missing or how to change it.
Therapy can be a place to slow down, understand yourself more deeply, and find a different way forward.
You don't have to figure it out by yourself. I can help.
MEET ANITA
Hi, I’m Anita.
I’m glad you’re here.
I know how easy it is to question yourself, even when some part of you already knows what you feel or need.
Growing up between cultures taught me how much of who we are can depend on the room we're in and who's looking, and it left me asking early on about the concepts of identity and belonging. My own path wasn't a straight line; years in the business world left me feeling unfulfilled and stuck, until my own therapy showed me what's possible when someone really listens, not just to what you're saying, but to what's beneath it. That experience changed the direction of my life.
I think of my style as compassionate curiosity. I listen for the moments that are easy to move past, like when you laugh off something painful, rush to explain someone else’s side, or say “I don’t know” just as something important begins to surface. I bring my full attention, ask real questions, and offer honest reflections, while respecting that you know your own experience better than anyone else. I won’t push something open before you’re ready, but I also won’t let what matters disappear unnoticed.
I keep a smaller practice so I can give each client the consistency, attention, and care that deeper work requires. If you want a therapist who will engage with you and help you move beyond understanding the pattern toward experiencing something different, we may work well together.
Specialties & Areas of Interest
-
Anxiety Therapy
When You Keep Bracing for What Comes Next
Even on a quiet day, your mind is three steps ahead, searching for what could go wrong.
Your body stays tense, even when you are supposed to be relaxing.
You keep functioning, but rarely feel settled enough to be fully present in your life.
-
Life Transitions Therapy
When the Life You Knew No Longer Fits
A move, graduation, breakup, career change, loss, or empty nest has shifted the ground beneath you.
The roles and routines that once anchored you no longer feel the same.
Everyone asks what comes next, while you are still trying to understand who you are now.
-
Self-Esteem and Perfectionism Therapy
When Nothing You Do Feels Like Enough
You finish something and immediately see what you could have done better.
One disappointed look can make you question a decision you felt sure about.
No matter how hard you work or how much you give, feeling good enough never seems to last.
-
Relationship and Boundary Therapy
When Keeping the Peace Costs You Your Voice
You say yes before you notice the no inside you.
You soften, rehearse, or overexplain what you need so no one gets upset.
You want closeness without having to disappear inside the relationship.
APPROACH
A Way Through,
Not Around
Maybe you learned to stay one step ahead, notice what everyone else needed before they had to ask, smooth things over, or keep difficult feelings to yourself. Those ways of coping helped you get through. But over time, they can make it harder to know what you actually feel, need, or want.
You may not need another way to push past yourself. You may need a place where you can finally hear yourself.
In therapy, we pay attention to the moments when you automatically say yes, second-guess yourself, or push a feeling aside. We get curious about where those responses came from and what they once did for you. Then we slow things down enough to feel what is underneath, not just explain it.
What happens between us matters, too.
Here, you can say what you really think, need, and feel without having to make it sound reasonable, take care of my feelings, or worry that you are too much. If you find yourself holding back, trying to get it right, or worrying that you have disappointed me, we can notice it together. This gives you a chance to experience something different while it is actually happening.
Over time, being met differently can help the inner critic lose some of its power, make it easier to trust your own experience, and give you more freedom to respond differently outside the therapy room.
Because change doesn’t happen only when you understand yourself differently. It happens when you begin to experience yourself differently, too.
What’s Possible
The goal isn’t a life without uncertainty or difficult feelings. It’s about being able to meet those moments without losing yourself and relating to yourself differently.
Over time, you may begin to notice:
✓ Your mind can slow down without having to solve every possible outcome first.
✓ You can hear the inner critic without automatically believing everything it says.
✓ You recognize what you want and need before resentment or exhaustion takes over.
✓ Someone else’s disappointment rarely automatically means you made the wrong choice.
✓ You can set a boundary and remain connected to yourself through the guilt.
✓ You bring more of yourself into relationships instead of shrinking to keep the peace.
✓ Uncertainty feels more manageable, and your decisions begin to feel more like your own.
Life doesn't suddenly become perfect. But it can feel less like something you're managing and more like something you're actually living.
PROCESS
A Simple Way to Begin Therapy
01.
Complete the
Consultation Request Form
Tell me a little about what brings you here and what you are looking for. You do not need to know exactly what to say. I’ll respond within two business days to arrange a free 20-minute consultation.
02.
Connect for a Free Consultation
We’ll talk about what's been going on, what you hope will feel different, and any questions you have. I’ll explain how I work, and we’ll both have a chance to see whether it feels like a good fit. There is no obligation to continue.
03.
Start Weekly Therapy
If we decide to move forward, we’ll schedule your first 50-minute session and begin meeting weekly. That consistency gives us time to build trust, understand the patterns that keep returning, and help new ways of responding take root.
LOCATION
Therapy in Orinda, CA, and Online Across California
My office is located at 23 Altarinda Road in Orinda, CA, a central, quiet location accessible from across the East Bay. In-person therapy is available for clients in Orinda, Lafayette, Moraga, Walnut Creek, Pleasant Hill, Berkeley, Oakland, and surrounding communities.
Online therapy is available to adults and college students throughout California, offering the same relational, depth-oriented work with greater flexibility.
FAQs
Frequently Asked Questions
-
You don’t need to be in crisis. If something has been present long enough that it’s started to feel like the background of your life, an anxiety that won’t quiet, a pattern you can’t move, a sense of going through the motions, that’s enough. If something here resonates, that’s worth paying attention to.
-
Many people have had therapy experiences that felt surface-level, too structured, or like good conversation that didn’t change anything underneath. My approach is relational and depth-oriented, I work with what’s underneath the patterns, not just the patterns themselves. If you’ve done the talking and the understanding and something still hasn’t moved, that gap between knowing and feeling is exactly where this work begins.
-
Sessions are 50 minutes, weekly. I follow what’s alive for you in each session rather than a rigid structure or agenda. The work is exploratory and relational — real conversation, not a program. Some sessions go somewhere unexpected. Most feel different from what people expect therapy to feel like.
-
Sessions are $180 for a 50-minute session.
I am also in-network with the following insurance providers:
Aetna
Cigna
Optum
UnitedHealthcare
If you're covered by one of these plans, your sessions may be partially or fully reimbursed depending on your benefits.
If I’m not in-network with your insurance provider, you may still be eligible for partial reimbursement through out-of-network benefits.
Many PPO plans cover a portion of therapy fees, often reimbursing 50–80% after your deductible is met.
I’m happy to provide a monthly detailed statement (superbill) that you can submit to your insurance provider for potential reimbursement.
For additional fee information and what to expect, visit the Fees & Insurance page.
-
Yes to both. In-person sessions are available at my office at 23 Altarinda Road in Orinda, CA, serving clients across the East Bay. Online therapy is available to anyone in California — the same relational, depth-oriented approach from wherever you are. Online sessions offer the same relational, depth-oriented approach with greater flexibility.
-
Reach out to schedule a free 20-minute consultation. It’s a real conversation, not a sales call. It gives us both a chance to get a sense of how I work, what you’re looking for, and whether this feels like the right fit. No commitment is required. I typically respond within two business days.
GET IN TOUCH
Start Feeling Connected to Yourself Again
…You don’t need to know exactly what’s missing before you begin.
Complete the Consultation Request Form to get started. From there, we'll set up a time to talk.
